Ambivalent Writing

After looking back at my research paper, I can see that there were some issues in my writing. Mr Tangen wrote, "I think the paper could have benefited from more coherence, but given the wide scope of the assignment I completely understood," something with which I agree. I believe my paper was good enough but I tried to cover a topic too large for a six-page essay.

What I understood overall from Mr Tangen's comments is that I need to integrate better my ideas throughout my writing and improve my diction. As in most of my writing, I used awkward words that probably only sound OK for students in CNG or people who speak a Spanish-influenced version of English. A lot of times CNG students like me use words that are phonetic translation of words in Spanish but have different meanings or connotations in English. Many of these end up sounding too French or Latin, like in an 18th or 19th century book (as we learned that during that time some people tried to incorporate Latin roots to make English more sophisticated). However, writing like that only sounds pompous or incoherent, not sophisticated. As for explaining my thesis better, or having "more coherence," I think that as I read and write more, I'll improve that. My issues in writing could be seen as all right with a descriptivist point of view but for academic writing, or just writing for school, I do need to improve in those areas. I perceive that by reading and writing more I could improve the issues I had in my research paper. Mr Tangen's comments were very accurate in my opinion and helped me see where I need to improve.